hey everyone, sorry i have not posted in awhile. well since my last post a lot has happened. I did get a job as a manger at the new harold ziegler lot in grandville! i start that next monday, so that's exciting. Becki and I are also engaged. I proposed two fridays ago, July 21st! the baby had nothing to do with it, that was the day i was planning on the entire time, i decided to not let the baby effect anything. so right now, im starting a new job, planning a wedding, and planning for a child! crazy life! anyway, thanks again to everyone, we have an ultrasound coming up when we will find out the sex of the baby, i will update you!
oh and btw, our slated wedding date is aug. 11th 07 if we can afford it, haha, anyone that knows any cheap places for reception, catering etc... let us know, hahaha 
-jdmfastdc2
Wednesday, August 2, 2006
****eric and becki update***
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Oops. I read the other post first. Depending on what type of reception you want, it's usually pretty cheap to have it at the church (if you're getting married at a church) or outside. I actually just used a caterer for my mom's wedding that was quite reasonable. She's from Hudsonville. If you want her info I can PM you. I think it was $8.50/person for a hot buffet. That didn't include a ton of extras, but that's really cheap. It was good, too. Best of luck with the plans. Give my congrats and hugs to Becki, too.
Congrats Eric! I am so thrilled for you guys! How fun! Do keep us posted! Luv, Christine
Yay Eric! Congratulations on all the things that are going your way. Smile You'll be busy for awhile, but you'll be so happy! I can't wait to hear what you'll be having.
(((Hugs))) and bellyrubs to Becki.
i was working the second day at my job today, telling my employees about how Becki had a doctors appointment today just to get everything checked on when my phone rang....
"they have to give me an ultrasound, they cant find a hearbeat, ill call u right back i have to go....."
about a half hour later i received another call asking me to leave work and come to her parents house....
we lost the baby
they guesstimated the heart stopped beating about a week ago, no cause, nothing we could have done. according to the doctors this happens in one in every 3.5 pregnancies. they may have just been saying that. i appreciate everyone that has helped and givin us support. im still in shock. more shock than when i found out she was pregnant. this is just about the worst thing that has ever happened to me.
Eric,
I am so sorry for your loss. I can't begin to imagine how you and Becki are feeling right now, but my thoughts and prayers are with you. Big (((HUGS))) to you and Becki.
My deepest sympathy for what you are going through...This is heartbreaking. I pray that you will allow this experience to draw you guys closer together and share your grief openly with oneanother. This can make you stronger as a couple and perhaps God willing, when the time is right, you will be parents together. Big hugs and lots of aloha from Hawaii.
Ohhhh Eric...I'm so sorry that this happened to you both! I wish I knew why this happened and could give you a good answer. I lost a baby too after the heartbeat had started, and actually it's pretty rare to have that happen. I know you're feeling anger and a lot of sadness. Give Becki lots of hugs and talk about it with her (and us) whenever you need to. Please know you're in our thoughts and prayers, and give Becki a big hug from me.
(PS...I'm going to move this to the Loss board tomorrow.)
(((HUGS))) I'm so sorry for your loss, Eric. Just like the others have already said, it's so important to work through this together, and hopefully it will make you stronger as a couple. You are both in my thoughts and prayers. Come here to talk, with Becki, too, whenever you need to.
so it's not that common for this to happen? the doc said it was...
This does happen...im in a pregnancy group on another website and out of that group...several women experienced this...im sorry for your loss though i know that just because it happens to other people does not make it any easier. I hope you are able to remain strong for your girlfriend. They gave the women in that group im in the option of having a D+C or letting it happen naturally depending on how far along they were. I wish you and her the best...you both will be in my thoughts. Try your best to be there for her right now and comfort her. Im hoping they can give you a reason for it!
I don't really know how common it is. I just know that I know several people personally who've had that happen, so to me it seems like it's not that uncommon, but I'm not a doctor, so I have no idea. I do know that it doesn't by any means mean that it will happen again, so don't worry about future pregnancies. Does she have to have a D&C? How many weeks was she? Hugs to you both, I hope you're doing alright.
they said the baby was 1 week underdeveloped so it may have died the day she was three months. shes having a d&c tomorrow
Statistics don't matter a whole lot, but after a hearbeat is seen/heard, the risk for miscarriage drops to between 5-10%. After 12 or 13 weeks, the risk is about 3%.
((((Hugs)))) for her tomorrow. I had a D&C too, since a natural miscarriage didn't occur. Mine had been detected at 7 weeks, and baby had died at 6 weeks.
You'll both be in my thoughts and prayers tomorrow and through the weekend.
well we did it today... for people who cannot hear disgusting stories stop reading now
becki started having contractions on the way to the hospital. after we waited in the waiting room she started to bleed everywhere, it was horrible. i found a nurse and demanded they take her in. she was bleeding everywhere. her sister was there with us and i actually had to leave becki's side a few times because i felt faint. i obviously told her i was going to the bathroom because i didnt want her to know i was getting queesy, but i dont think any guy can see, or even hear about horrible bleeding from "down there" and be okay with it. we waited for over two hours in her room. she was having pains every two minutes or so. i didnt tell her i think they were contractions, but im pretty sure. she was in horrible pain, screaming and crying. it hurt me so bad inside, to know there was nothing i could do to help my baby(becki) ive never seen her like that and felt so helpless.. im the type that likes to fix everything. it went on for awhile, just horrible bleeding, they say she lost well over a gallon. they finally got her in and all was well after ward, thank god.
becki was told that with her endometriosis, having a child can help a lot if not clear it up. the doctor told us that with that disease it can hinder her ability to have a child or conceive, and if we try again relitively soon, her chances may be better since she was just technically pregnant. so were gonna.
its amazing how just a few months ago i was shrieking when we found out she was pregnant, and terrified, and weighing our decision, and now we are gonna try again. we are going to shorten our engagement, not just so we can have a baby in the right order, but because the reason we were waiting longer before was because of her being pregnant and we wanted the baby to be old enough so we could go on a honeymoon etc. now we figure... were so in love and want to get married anyway (we would now) so why not move it up a little earlier next year, so we can have a wedding, go on a honeymoon, and make a baby there Wink
so were definetaly gonna try again almost right away. were gonna take some precautions of pre-conception to a healthier baby and go for it....
input?
Eeek I am so sorry you guys had to go through all that...It is good that you are so supportive and want to get married and make things "official". I would caution about rushing right into another pregnancy though. Give yourselves time to grieve for this baby and let go of that. Healing will take some time physically as well for her. It is often tempting to hurry and have another baby to replace the one you lost but emotionally you need to make sure you are both ok before plunging ahead blindly. Does this make sense? Must acknowledge this loss and deal with it before starting over. My $0.02 for what its worth Wink Big hugs all around.
ya i understand and agree. it would prob. be like an early march wedding so we'd still have a good six months, and even after that were not sworn to have a baby ya know.
What a horrible day. I'm so sorry you both had to experience that. I think your plan for getting married earlier in the year and then trying for another baby is absolutely perfect. I hope it works out exactly as you plan. Smile
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